Cum Art

Riley had a new play thing at her disposal.  She had a really great night and had to share her man conquest with her best girl, Ellie.

"This guy is way too sweet for my own good.  He already knows all my buttons and pushes them one by one."

Ellie was fully engaged. 

"But he has this freak side.  He wants me to play with his cum after he finishes. That's totally a first for me."

Ellie was perplexed, "What does he want you to do, paint a damn picture?"

Riley laughed for a minute.  "What the fuck?  That's hilarious.  I suppose I could."

Ellie was on a roll, "Add a little food coloring and you can be fucking Picasso."

Riley rolled her eyes. 

Ellie had her own conquest to share.  "Once I had a dude mix his cum in with his kid's homemade slime. Now, if that's not a freak side, I surely don't know what is."

Riley continued, "There's this other thing tho, he really isn't that interested in getting head.  I mean, I started to give it and he flat out said, 'NO. Its all about you.'  I shrugged and said 'Okay, babe.  I'm down with that."

Ellie wasn't about to let that golden nugget of information fly away....."What's up with this dudes dick?" She said this flatly.

Nothing!! Riley exclaimed.  "Well, I don't think there's anything wrong with it.  Omg, do you think there's an issue with his cock!?  Holy Shit, what could be wrong with his dick?  

Riley was totally rolling scenarios in her head. She was deep in thought about all the possibilities.  

The girl's token male, 'player' friend, Randy, walks over to them.  He had overhead the girl's conversation and was grinning his typical grin.  

He had a field day listening to these girls chatter and chuckle over men. It was extremely insightful.  

Ellie smirked and continued her thoughts without skipping a beat. 

"Well off the top of my head....

His dick could have an extra pee hole.

It could be crooked.  

Or maybe he only has one ball."

Riley thought about those scenarios intently. 

  "Could that be true?"  No. No. NOOO!  No way.  I know for sure he has two balls.   Hmmm...., but that pee hole scenario.  You may be on to something.  There could really be something up.  Maybe it's like 2 toned?"

Riley and Ellie, looked at one another, locked eyes and smiled while in thought. Hmmmmm.......

Than they looked at Randy.  He had that face on, the one that said, 'Well I didn't do it!'

Randy laughed and reassured the girls that the dudes dick was probably just fine.  Maybe he was simply into different things.  Randy didn't really think that.  He knew the dude probably had some weird hang up, but he was going to let Riley navigate that on her own.

He began to share his own ridiculous tale of a 19 year old he recently meet.  The sister of a friend.

"Now, this girl, let me tell you, speaking of freak sides, this girl was obsessed with male cum.  She told me she hated to see it go to waste. 

She cherished cum so damn much, she would lick it up off the floor so it would not go to waste. She asked me very matter of factly. 'Do you enjoy it on your pancakes?'

I looked at her intently and asked very seriously. 'Pancakes? Like you mix it in the batter?'  

'No, of course not.' She responded with a straight face. 'I put it right on top with the syrup.  It's the best that way.'

Randy saw the surprised and twisted look on his girl friend's faces. 

"You aren't making this up are you, Randy?" Ellie knew Randy never made these things up, but she had to ask.  

"I kid you not.  It takes, I Can't Believe it's not Butter to an entire new level."

The three cracked up! If you can't find humor in our inner freak, what the hell else can you do? 

The woes of being a single, ya just never know what you're gonna get and how much of a freak someone is until you actually get with the person.

Moral of the Story:

Freaky is as Freaky does.  

Relish in your inner freekdom.

And make sure it's REAL Butter on Your Pancakes.